One: Ascension
Waiting for the bus
Makes me want to kill myself.
Fucking MUNI sucks.
Two: Experience
Oh dirty thirty-
Is that swine flu over there?
This ride might kill me.
Three: Descent
Thank God that’s over.
Wait- swine flu incubation?
Guess we’ll wait and see…
Four: Alternative One
Searching for parking
Almost make me miss MUNI.
Everything just blows.
Five: Alternative Two
Now I’m out on foot
Toward Embarcadero.
Fucking hills fuck fuck!!!!!
Archive for the ‘Unacceptable’ Category
An ode to transportation, in five parts- AKA you just can’t win
Posted in No Thank You, Seriously?, Unacceptable, tagged muni, parking, sf on August 11, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
An open letter
Posted in Seriously?, Unacceptable, tagged breast, gross, molestation, plane, skeezy bastard on October 29, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Dear Passenger 12B on SA Flt 2 from Singapore to San Francisco:
It’s not that I didn’t appreciate being woken up by your hand massaging my breast. It was a long flight, and I’m worried about DVT, so it was good that I woke and was able to walk up and down the cabin to get [...]
On Singapore
Posted in No Thank You, Seriously?, Traditions, Unacceptable, tagged impatience, layover on August 18, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I do love Changi
But this long-ass layover
Is driving me nuts.
On discretion, lost
Posted in No Thank You, Seriously?, Unacceptable on August 12, 2008 | 1 Comment »
It’s not that I’m nuts.
It’s that you’re a crazy witch
Who makes my life hell.
Y’erb, Part IV
Posted in No Thank You, Seriously?, Traditions, Unacceptable, tagged enough!, revenge, war, y'erb on August 10, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Goddammit, weedhound!
The days of nostalgia? Done.
War, motherfucker.
On adultery, in two parts
Posted in No Thank You, Seriously?, Unacceptable, tagged adultery, balthazar, losers, pathetic, shame, sienna on July 29, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
#1:
Sienna Miller,
Topless with a married dad-
Way to make mum proud!
#2
And you, Balthazar!
“Loser” is too kind a word.
Good job, you moron.
We’ve come a long way, baby.
Posted in In Other News..., Seriously?, Thanks Jackass, Unacceptable, tagged brooke hogan, idiot, moron, offensive on July 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Or not. This just in:
“Back in his glory as a pro wrestler, Hulk Hogan knew all about testosterone and how a man’s hormones can skyrocket once he gets in the ring.
His daughter, Brooke Hogan, seems to know all about the emotions of her own gender. And she thinks that even though men can be emotional, [...]
On Y’erb
Posted in Traditions, Unacceptable, tagged febreze, smelly, weedhound, y'erb on July 25, 2008 | 1 Comment »
I’ve begun to miss
The pungent smell of weedhound.
Sell my Febreze stock!
On Perrier
Posted in AWKWARD!, Seriously?, Unacceptable, tagged haiku on July 23, 2008 | 1 Comment »
My “green” co-workers
Who always compost tea bags,
Love the Frenchie fizz.
Flavor Flav can start off the bidding
Posted in In Other News..., Seriously?, Unacceptable, tagged gross, narcissism, plastic surgery on July 10, 2008 | 2 Comments »
This just in:
“Brigitte Nielsen is undergoing plastic surgery on a new German reality TV show.
The model/actress will have a facelift, breast surgery and liposuction in the four-part series. The first episode aired on Sunday night, and was watched by 2.5 million viewers, who saw fat being sucked out of the 44-year-old’s hips.
Nielsen — the [...]
