me: omg
just sent you an e
running to the bathroom but bbiaf!
Sent at 10:22 AM on Thursday
me: hey
omg
wrong window
hahahaha
hahahahhahaha
i am so awesome
i did not send you an email
but hi anyway
Sent at 10:26 AM on Thursday
asfilner: wow
my computer broadcast all this to 20 people
awesome
Sent at 10:34 AM on Thursday
The best part is [...]
Archive for the ‘Thanks Jackass’ Category
IM of the Week
Posted in AWKWARD!, Thanks Jackass on April 30, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
On blindsided, being
Posted in Seriously?, Thanks Jackass, tagged digital voicemail, fucked up, tech screwup on October 6, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
What? I have voicemail?
Surprise! Messages from my
Now-dead grandmother.
On values
Posted in Seriously?, Thanks Jackass, tagged friendship, thoughtless, values on September 1, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I know the diff’rence
Between consideration
And politeness. You?
We’ve come a long way, baby.
Posted in In Other News..., Seriously?, Thanks Jackass, Unacceptable, tagged brooke hogan, idiot, moron, offensive on July 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Or not. This just in:
“Back in his glory as a pro wrestler, Hulk Hogan knew all about testosterone and how a man’s hormones can skyrocket once he gets in the ring.
His daughter, Brooke Hogan, seems to know all about the emotions of her own gender. And she thinks that even though men can be emotional, [...]
Ahhhhh, Texas.
Posted in AWKWARD!, Seriously?, Thanks Jackass, tagged f'd up families, pizza, robbery, texas on July 24, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
This just in:
Denton, Texas (AP) –
“Police said they will not file charges against a clerk whose parents and husband were charged with robbing the pizza restaurant where she worked, officials said. Police said the clerk didn’t know they planned to rob the Pizza Patron Friday night.
While the robbery was in progress, the clerk discovered [...]
Jackassiest breakup lines
Posted in AWKWARD!, Seriously?, Thanks Jackass on July 16, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Annoying/patronizing/insensitive/comedic substitutes for “I just don’t love you” or “I’m just not that into you” or “I’m totally crazy/a giant a-hole and am doing you a huge favor.” Please submit yours!
Here we go, in no particular order…
1) “I need to contemplate life.”
2) “I have stuff to work out.”
3) “I’m corresponding with a few women [...]
Y’erb, Part II
Posted in Thanks Jackass, Unacceptable, tagged weed, y'erb on April 2, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Dear weedhound,
Did you think we were kidding?
It’s not that I’m allergic to repeating myself. And I know far too well that people can’t change overnight (and most, not at all). But seriously? Did you think we wouldn’t notice the recent, shall we say, lapse in your behavior?
I’ve said what I have to [...]
Great.
Posted in In Other News..., Thanks Jackass, Unacceptable, tagged Florida, snakes on February 21, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
This just in:
“In addition to everything else to worry about, now comes the Burmese python.
The giant snakes are slithering from Florida toward the Bay Area, very slowly to be sure, but inexorably. And they can strangle and eat an entire alligator.
The U.S. Geological Survey released a map Wednesday showing that the Bay Area has [...]
Facebook wants you to practice your penmanship and eat your vegetables.
Posted in Thanks Jackass, tagged facebook, overextended, pressure on February 21, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Damn it, Facebook! You’re so cute and multi-faceted and I’m totally psyched that you’ve reunited me with random people I never knew I wanted to see again. But you have this really annoying way of making me feel inferior. Like, there’s the friend count and the billions of little applications I’ll never have time for [...]
Y’erb
Posted in Thanks Jackass, tagged y'erb on February 18, 2008 | 1 Comment »
To the weedhound down the hall:
Hey there. How’s it going? I know you’re busy hitting the pipe, as you seem to always be, but I thought I’d just take a minute of your time to make a friendly observation.
Isn’t it great that we live in such a wonderful, family-friendly San Francisco building? [...]
