Small type and keys suck-
Yet I take you everywhere.
Look! I’m important!
Archive for July, 2008
On the Blackberry Pearl
Posted in Uncategorized on July 31, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Classic.
Posted in In Other News..., Seriously?, tagged ryan seacrest, shark on July 31, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
This just in:
“‘American Idol’ host Ryan Seacrest is recovering after a shark bit him this weekend.
The TV personality was swimming in the ocean off California when the baby predator nibbled his foot. He says, ‘I was bitten by a shark. … (There were) a thousand people in the ocean, and I get bit by the [...]
On thrift, and denial
Posted in Overheard, Traditions, tagged breakup, gross, sad, toothbrush on July 30, 2008 | 1 Comment »
She is still using
The toothbrush you left behind.
It was almost new.
On adultery, in two parts
Posted in No Thank You, Seriously?, Unacceptable, tagged adultery, balthazar, losers, pathetic, shame, sienna on July 29, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
#1:
Sienna Miller,
Topless with a married dad-
Way to make mum proud!
#2
And you, Balthazar!
“Loser” is too kind a word.
Good job, you moron.
We’ve come a long way, baby.
Posted in In Other News..., Seriously?, Thanks Jackass, Unacceptable, tagged brooke hogan, idiot, moron, offensive on July 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Or not. This just in:
“Back in his glory as a pro wrestler, Hulk Hogan knew all about testosterone and how a man’s hormones can skyrocket once he gets in the ring.
His daughter, Brooke Hogan, seems to know all about the emotions of her own gender. And she thinks that even though men can be emotional, [...]
On Y’erb
Posted in Traditions, Unacceptable, tagged febreze, smelly, weedhound, y'erb on July 25, 2008 | 1 Comment »
I’ve begun to miss
The pungent smell of weedhound.
Sell my Febreze stock!
Ahhhhh, Texas.
Posted in AWKWARD!, Seriously?, Thanks Jackass, tagged f'd up families, pizza, robbery, texas on July 24, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
This just in:
Denton, Texas (AP) –
“Police said they will not file charges against a clerk whose parents and husband were charged with robbing the pizza restaurant where she worked, officials said. Police said the clerk didn’t know they planned to rob the Pizza Patron Friday night.
While the robbery was in progress, the clerk discovered [...]
On Perrier
Posted in AWKWARD!, Seriously?, Unacceptable, tagged haiku on July 23, 2008 | 1 Comment »
My “green” co-workers
Who always compost tea bags,
Love the Frenchie fizz.
Define “bad”
Posted in In Other News..., Seriously?, tagged crazy, supermodel, violent on July 23, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
This just in:
“Naomi Campbell has slammed the media for continually portraying her in a negative way, insisting she isn’t a ‘bad person.’ The British supermodel, who is notorious for her angry outbursts, was recently fined and sentenced to 200 hours of community service after assaulting two police officers onboard a British Airways flight at London’s [...]
On lobster
Posted in AWKWARD!, Seriously?, tagged haiku on July 21, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
She’s got a claw hand.
It freaked him out the first time,
But now he likes it.
